Saturday, May 28, 2005

Random thoughts while driving/packing/moving/celebrating

We're finally at the tail end of this three week long moving/celebrating fest. Anxious to get in the new place and get settled. Only one more 8 hour round trip and one 4 hour one-way trip left to Houston! YAY! Then I am going to park my car in the garage and never leave again! (OK, not really. But I'm not traveling for a long, long time).

Anyway, the following are random thoughts I've had lately...

**Buzzards. They get no respect. God was not merciful to these creatures when he made them. I mean, lets face it. They are ugly as sin. Yet, they do so much for us. They clean the road-kill. Can you imagine if they didn't eat road kill? We would have all kinds of creatures decaying and stinking on country roads. We should be thanking these birds. But do we drive down the road and say "OH, LOOK! A BUZZARD!" like we would a bluebird, or a hummingbird, or a painted bunting? No. We say in a dissapointed way "ewww...a buzzard". So, I today say all hail to the buzzard. And thanks for being the sanitary workers of nature.

**Words of wisdom...if you are going to buy a house it may LOOK like a good idea to have the laundry room upstairs with the bedrooms. And your father may say it won't be a big deal to get the washer upstairs. But make sure he knows that the staircase is one of those "broken" ones, where you go up a few steps then turn on a landing and go up a few more. And that the dolly won't be able to turn on the landing. Nothing is as unsettling as watching a clothes washer tumble down the stairs on top of your husband.

**Why is it that old people like to bombard you with newspaper clippings? Maybe it's just the old people I know. Or, come to think of it, I'm thinking it's not OLD people, but just my husbands family. Or maybe just people from Minnestoa, as that is where his mom's family is from. I don't think hubby grandmother, aunt, or mother have ever read a newspaper without a pair of scissors in hand. Every time I see them or get a letter from them I get 5 or 10 from each of them. And it is usually stuff that I can't figure out why they would think I would be interested. Or a recipe. Yet I feel obligated to read them for fear I will get 20 questions later. Is this a common phenomenon?

Now, I'm going to take a nap while I can! That is...if I can find the bed in between these boxes.

Tuesday, May 24, 2005

Popping in!

Thought I would peek a moment between moving boxes and celebrations. I miss my blogging friends!

Closed on the house, got the apartment I had in Houston moved to the new place, working on packing the house, cleaning, etc. All this while trying to keep my legs and feet from swelling like elephants, and trying not to lift anything major. Oh, joy.

The church had a baby shower for us the other day! It was so nice. Much against all my better judgement....Here's a picture...see how I'm becoming pleasantly plump? And I have three months to go. YIKES!

And now for a moment of sappyness....this is a warning. Bare with me:
I am amazed at how you can love something you can't see. I can feel this baby moving inside me, I can even SEE her move when I look at my tummy. But I am so amazed how I can love her so much. I don't know what she looks like. I don't know her personality. I don't even know if she'll be easy or difficult. And none of it matters. I love her anyway.

Now, go visit David at Amateur Dad and wish him well...they are inducing his wife TODAY!

Friday, May 13, 2005

Grandmas and Minnesota

Imagine an 84 year old woman and an obviously pregnant woman walking through the airport together. If you were in the Minneapolis/St. Paul airport on Thursday that would have been the scene. I flew up to the twin cities on Wednesday, rented a car, drove to Mankato and picked my hubby’s 84 year old grandma to bring her down for his upcoming graduation/ordination festivities. She is afraid to fly alone and I was elected to be her escort. I spent Wednesday night at her little apartment and we took off at 7:30am for the airport again on Thursday.

I love his Grandma. She is a sweet little old lady. She walks slow, shuffling each foot an inch at a time. She can’t stand for long. She can’t see very well. Her hearing is poor. But grandma has no problem talking. BOY can she talk. And talk. And talk. And talk. All of these features combined make for an interesting two days when you are alone with grandma for that long.

I got to her apartment at 3:30 p.m. She was standing at the door waiting for me with her coat on already, even though I told her I would be there between 4:00 and 4:30 p.m. She hugged me and immediately said “Are you hungry?” My husband’s family will NOT let anyone starve. They will let you in the house, shove food down your throat, and massage your tonsils while it is on the way down.

I said “Grandma, it’s 3:30. I ate at one o’clock on the plane”
She said “Oh, I think you must be hungry”
I barely got out “but really, I’m n….”
Grandma, halfway out the door “Lets go! I’m sure you’re hungry”

OK, some battles aren’t worth fighting. We went to her favorite restaurant, the Dam Store. She emphasizes the “DAM” part of the name and giggles whenever she says it. I wonder if she doesn’t like the restaurant just because she is an old very Lutheran woman who doesn’t curse, and she’s allowed to say “Damn” when she says “Dam Store”. Anyway, this is a hole in the wall place. The tables are warped and crooked. The seats are tearing. The floor is coming up. But they have great home-cooked burgers and shakes. The young woman behind the counter makes rhubarb pies that her grandma taught her how to make. This is all grandma needed to know to make it her favorite restaurant.

The temperature was 45 degrees in Minnesota. That night Grandma said “I turned on the heat to 78. I know Texas is a lot hotter than here!”
I said “Grandma, I have flannel pajamas. We don’t keep it that hot at our house! Don’t you normally turn your heat off? Really I would be more comfortable……”
Grandma replied “I think you need a fourth blanket. Here is a wool quilt”
I said “Really, Grandma, we keep our air on cooler than th…..”
She said, “Oh, you must be tired!”
I said “Grandma, it’s 8 o’clock”
Grandma said “Oh, it’s so late! I’m going to leave you alone so you can go to bed”
I said “Really, I never go to bed bef….”
Grandma was halfway to her room. Truth is, she goes to bed at 8 p.m. And I laid there with flannel pajamas and no covers in a pool of sweat all night. Watching the clock.

The entire two days I think I maybe finished one sentence. She told me the life stories of her hairdresser, neighbors, the manager at Old Country Buffet, her minister, her various cousins, nieces, nephews, their spouses, and repeated stories about her husband when he was alive. And then she repeated the life stories of hairdresser, neighbors, the manager at Old Country Buffet, her minister, her various cousins, nieces, nephews, their spouses, and repeated stories about her husband when he was alive. Then She repeated them all a third, and if they were really good fourth time. Many times she would say “Did I tell you about so-and-so” and I would say “Yes, grandma, you di….” and she would start on the story and go on and on.

In the airport we were a scene. She had to have a wheelchair so she couldn’t go through security. She had a fit when they put the metal detector wand over her and patted her down. She didn’t understand why her metal earrings were OK going through the X-Ray. When they came with the cart of drinks on the plane she asked me how much they were. I told her they were free. She said “certainly they aren’t free”. So, she asked the flight attendant anyway.

By the time we got to our house on Thursday at 5pm I was exhausted. I went to bed at 8:30 that night. SHE, the 84 year old woman, however, was wired. She stayed up until 10:30 pm repeating the stories about her hairdresser, neighbors, the manager at Old Country Buffet, her minister, her various cousins, nieces, nephews, their spouses, and repeated stories about her husband when he was alive to my husband. I think I heard Bryan squeak “but” and “Yes” twice. I’m not sure.

Tuesday, May 10, 2005

I'll never learn.

One thing about me that my husband has always griped about is...I never learn. I don't know the word "no". Well, I KNOW it. I just typed it over there. But I'm the first one to say "I can do it!", or other variations of that phrase. Need a cake for the church bake sale? "I'll do it!" Need a babysitter? "I'll do it!" Need someone to clean your house because you are recovering from a hospital stay? "I'll do it!"

I've had two businesses that went from hobbies to full-fledged business, to so successful I couldn't handle it on my own with my full time job besides. You would think after the first one I would have learned. But no. (Hey! There's the word again!)

So, when I realized I would be 6 months pregnant when moving several months ago, and when people offered to help, I should have jumped at it. But no. I said "Oh, I can handle it! No problem!"

That wouldn't be so bad...except...I also volunteered to fly up to Minnesota and drive two hours one way to pick up my husbands 82 year old grandmother and then the next morning drive back to the airport and fly back with her. I also volunteered to have the family here for the weekend for my husband's graduation (With a Masters of Divinity! Woo Hoo! He finished!) Yes, during the middle of a move. I also volunteered to bake a cake and decorate it with my new cake decorating skills for a congratulations/good luck party the church is giving my husband. I also volunteered to make a flower arrangement for a brunch next week. I also volunteered to have a picnic for the family (12 people) in two weeks at our NEW house for my husbands commissioning ceremony.

All of this while packing, getting things turned on, getting things turned off, and I'm still also moving out of the apartment I had while working in Houston. BESIDES moving out of the house to a new one. So, I guess that really qualifies as TWO moves. At once.

Why don't I listen to my husband? Before I was pregnant I would get myself in a time crunch, panic, lose sleep, but I managed. But now I keep forgetting that I'm 6 months pregnant. And now, my feet are so swollen that I can't put my shoes on, my back hurts, and it took me two hours to clean two bathrooms today. Yea, I'm in trouble.

So, if I'm not on here much (I'll be off and on for the next three weeks) you know why. And try not to say "I told you so".

Sunday, May 08, 2005

Opinions Please!

Got my hair trimmed yesterday and the hair stylist asked me if I wanted my hair flat-ironed. I have naturally curly hair, and generally just wash, dry and go. But if she was willing to go through all that extra work, I thought, "Hey! Might as well go different!"

So, I had my hair straight for the day. And then my family got into a discussion over weather I looked better with straight hair or curly. And one family member STRONGLY said I should straighten it every day. And the other three said the first one was crazy, that the curly hair was the best on me. So, I thought I would ask you all what you thought. Should I straighten it on a regular basis? Keep it curly?

Keep in mind, the pictures aren't the best. One makes me look like I have a fake tan (which I DO NOT). The other makes my face look bleached (which is probably more accurate.). But I think you can see what you need to of the hair in both.

Friday, May 06, 2005

My Husband Likes Frilly Little Girl Clothes

He is going to kill me for this title if he reads my blog. Which he never does, so I think I’m safe. Well, he does if I grab his ear, staple his butt to the chair, and pull it up for him. But I only do that if there’s something REALLY good on it. And we all know how often that is. Unfortunately.

Anyway, we went to babies R us to change some things on our registry. Since I had gotten some advice on here and other places on what to and what not to register for, we decided to go and make changes. I’m glad we didn’t start out registering at Babies R us. That place is intimidating, and if Target and Toys R us had our head spinning I’m sure Babies R us would have sent us into a permanent shock. Permanent shock generally isn’t a good idea BEFORE the baby is born.

I started looking around. Bryan is NOT a shopper. He tries very hard to appease me. I pretty much know I have about three hip shifts (you know, weight on right leg, arm leaning on a clothes rack is the first hip shift. Then weight on left leg, hand under the chin is second shift. Then the third and final shift is back to the weight on right leg) before he starts loudly sighing and I must make my purchasing decisions and go quickly because he is about to explode.

I had to go through the baby clothes section before I left Babies R us. How could I not?? Especially since we are having a little girl. Those little girl clothes are so ADORABLE. I started walking through there, expecting him to lightly pull me back to the isle. But, he followed. So, I started looking at the frilly little girl dresses. And I said “This is so cute!” I looked out of the corner of my eye to see if he was on the first or second hip shift. I almost swallowed my gum when I realized he hadn’t even gotten to the first hip yet. So, I decided to push it.

I picked up a dress and said “Dear, isn’t this the cutest?” I waited patiently for the eye roll and the “Yes, now let’s go.” However, much to my surprise he said “Yes, that really is!” I looked up at him again. After all, when I was little once I went up to a woman at the grocery store thinking she was my mom and asked her to buy me some spray cheese. The woman made a noise and I looked up and ran. Hey, I was only about 5 and had never been so embarrassed. I thought perhaps I made the same mistake with some other man at Babies R Us. But I hadn’t! It was Bryan morphed into some unrecognizable little-girl’s-dad mode.

Next thing I new, HE picked up a little frilly dress and said “Look at this one.” If I had a medic alert button around my neck I think I would have pushed it at that point. My head got dizzy. My throat went dry. I was about to fall and not be able to get up. I was in such bliss. My husband was actually enjoying looking at little girl clothes with me. I didn’t know how to act! I started to worry he had broken out with a fever that made him delirious.

I picked up a few more things to look at, a cheerleader outfit from our favorite sports team (yea, I knew THAT would get him), an Easter dress. No hip shifts. No eye rolls, no “Hurry up”. More “Oh, yea, that’s cute too”.

The whole ordeal lasted about 10 minutes. I decided I better leave after that long because if he did morph back into his hip-shifting-eye-rolling self the moment would have been ruined forever. Yes, in 12 years of marriage I’ve learned how far to push.

Tuesday, May 03, 2005

Forget everything I've said.

My last few posts have been about not being moody while pregnant and liking old people. Well, I decided after my experience today...I lied.

Unfortunately, because I live in the sticks, I have two choices for grocery shopping. Pay twice to three times as much at this mom-and-pop-shop which is 10 miles away, or go to the discount superstore that starts with a "W" that is 40 miles away. Yea. That one. I rather dispise this place, as I stated in an earlier post.

Once a month (sometimes twice) I go to the discount place to get the bulk of my groceries. When I need milk or other things that you can't get a month in advance I'll go to the mom-and-pop place.

Yesterday was my monthly trip. I thought while I was in town I would get my oil changed. After all, it was well overdue. I've never gotten my oil changed at the discount store before, but I figured, hey, I would be spending at least an hour gathering groceries. It was just so darn convenient. So, I pulled up beside the building. There were 4 stalls to chose from. I had no idea where to go, so I just picked one.

I got out of my car, and a man who looked like he was born in the stone age came out. He was a low talker. I could hardly understand a word he said, which was probably good, because due to the words I did understand I wanted to kick him in the nuts (hence, why I'm talking back the I'm not moody while pregnant that I stated earlier).

He mumbled "What do you want".
I said "an oil change, please"
He mumbled sarcastically, "And you parked in front of the tire stall?"

I wanted to say "How the hell was I supposed to know, ASSHOLE?"
But I didn't. I refrained. I counted to ten. I realized that I would never say that in my normal non-pregnant state. So, instead, I said "I'm sure that's happened before. This is my first time here" in a sarcastic voice. Lame, but that's all I could come up with while counting to ten.

He ignored my comment and asked what kind of car I had. I replied "A Honda CRV".

He went around back and looked at what I assume was the licence plate. Then he said "What kind of vehicle did you say this was?". I am 99% sure he was saying that to be an ass, because RIGHT IN FRONT of him in very large letters on the back of the car it said "Honda CRV". So, I went back, pointed and said "A Honda CRV".

He then mumbled "I'm sure you don't know how many miles are on it".

OK, does he just ASSUME I'm stupid? He went to open the door to look and I said "50,500 miles". Jerk.

THEN, he says "Which service do you want?". I asked what services they offered. He said "Oil changes". By then I was ticked. TICKED. I mean, I know they offer a just the basics oil change and a fancy check everything oil change but I didn't know what the fancy check everything oil change was called, and, heaven forbid I call it the WRONG thing and he be a jerk about it. So, I said "Well, don't you offer one that you check tire pressure and fluid levels?" He typed something in the computer, handed me a ticket, and walked away.

I yelled after him "And can you tell me when to expect it?". He mumbled something. I didn't have the energy to ask what he said.

Sigh. Just when I was in a happy bliss of sunshine and singing birdies, I had to run into this jerk.

Monday, May 02, 2005

I can't wait until I'm old.

Actually, I can. But I do love old people. Perhaps because I never had grandparents growing up. My mom was a foster child and my dad's parents were deceased before or shortly after I was born. So, I always felt a little jipped on the grandparent issue. When I was in high school I adopted a grandmother through a service. The adopted grandmother was named "Mary" (aren't all old ladies named "Mary"?). Mary lived in a nursing home. She was in her 80's, in a wheelchair, and had a stroke so her left side was non-functional. Because of her stroke she had a hard time speaking. Her sentances were usually less than three words, and were very labored.

Mary's only family was a niece who lived across the country. The niece came to see her maybe once every three months, and for some reason didn't like us visiting. I think Mary may have had money or something. It was a nice nursing home, after all. And maybe the niece thought we were after it? Just a guess. When the niece was there she always asked us to leave and made a comment about how her FAMILY was there or something along those lines. And Mary would get upset, but we would just come back when the niece wasn't there. She wasn't there that often.

Anyway, when Bryan and I started dating he went with me to see Mary. When we got engaged Mary was so excited! She tried to tell everyone that walked by us in the nursing home about the engagement, but just ended up making squealing noises, so she would take my hand with the ring and shove it in the air. She was so cute.

There were others in the nursing home that we got to know a little bit while we were there. One lady, who I assume had alzheimers, would light up when we walked in the room. She would see Bryan and exclaim "LIVINGSTON!". Or sometimes she would see me and yell "BEVERLY!". Bryan, who later worked as a social worker at a nursing home, would come over to her and say "hello", and it would just delight her that "Livingston" came for a visit. For the longest time when I was kidding around with Bryan we would call eachother "Beverly" and "Livingston". I assume they were relatives of hers.

Now that I'm pregnant I seem to be very popular with the older generation. I walk in the room and they flock to touch the belly. Yesterday a tiny white haired lady came over and asked the typical questions, and then asked "Do you feel her move?" I said "Oh, yes, a lot". She looked at Bryan, looked at me, then whispered in a I'm-hard-of-hearing-so-I'm-not-wispering-but-I-think-I-am voice "well, she's going to have huge feet, so she's going to kick the HELL out of you". ROFL.

I love old people.

Sunday, May 01, 2005

A Meme

True Jersey Girl sent me a Meme (Hey, how did that term come up, anyway? The first time I saw someone reference a "meme" I had no idea what they were talking about. If someone would like to enlighten me....)

Her answers were great. I hope I can live up! Here goes:

What follows is a list of different occupations. You must select at least five of them. You may add more if you like to your list before you pass it on (after you select five of the items as it was passed to you).

Of the five you selected, you are to finish each phrase with what you would do as a member of that profession. Then pass it on to three other bloggers.

Here's that list:

If I could be a scientist... If I could be a farmer...
If I could be a musician... If I could be a doctor...
If I could be a painter... If I could be a gardener...
If I could be a missionary... If I could be a chef...
If I could be an architect... If I could be a linguist...
If I could be a psychologist... If I could be a librarian...
If I could be an athlete... If I could be a lawyer...
If I could be an innkeeper... If I could be a professor...
If I could be a writer... If I could be a backup dancer...
If I could be a llama-rider... If I could be a bonnie pirate...
If I could be a midget stripper... If I could be a proctologist...
If I could be a TV-Chat Show host... If I could be an actor...
If I could be a judge... If I could be a Jedi...
If I could be a mob boss... If I could be a backup singer …
If I could be a CEO... If I could be a movie reviewer …

If I could be a movie reviewer...then the movie industry would probably go south because I'm pretty picky!

If I could be a backup would be in the act of Abbott and Costello. If you could see me dance you would fully understand why.

If I could be a proctologist...I would try to keep the jokes at a minimum.

If I could be a husband would probably want to marry me all over again. He's such a star-wars geek.

If I could be a painter...I would definitely go broke.

Three other bloggers....Angie ('cuz she's my very good friend and therefore obligated to do these things), Adrienne (same reason), Elle (Because I like her and she is a great writer. I bet she would be very good at this.)