I need to lose 10 pounds to be happy and 20 to be ecstatic. In the larger scheme of things it's not that much. I SHOULD be able to do it with my eyes closed. After all, I see "so and so lost 100 pounds in 10 weeks" or other rediculous ads all the time. But on a more realistic level, if I put my mind to it I could shed 10 to 15 easily in 6 weeks or so.
So, why don't I do it?
It isn't that I forget about it. I obsess over it all the time. When I get dressed every morning I go into a state of depression. When I go to the bathroom I obsess over it. When I eat I obsess over it. When I look in the mirror, see an old friend, work with someone I haven't worked with in a while, go shopping. It is CONSTANTLY in the back of my mind. When I have sex (I know, too much information) that's all I think about, and if I have to go clothes shopping, well, just don't come near me for at least several hours unless you want to be in a bad mood, too.
But I don't do it.
I eat the crap anyway.
Oprah (oh, yes, Oprah) says there's a reason more than the fact that the food tastes good that people overeat. If that's the case, then what the hell is MY reason? I wasn't abused as a child, my parents didn't divorce, I never felt overly ridiculed and I always knew my father (like Wynnona Judd says is her reason).
Just lose the freakin' 10 to 20 pounds already! Get off the I-hate-myself bandwagon! Can't be that complicated!
Geez, I'm such a loser.