Esmerelda was dumb. She didn't realize she was dumb until it was too late. After all, in elementary school and high school she made good grades. Her IQ score was 130. That's genious level everyone told her.
But Esmerelda did dumb things despite what the records revealed. She should have known she was dumb since there were signs from when she was a wee one. I guess Esmerelda was in denial. When she was about 5 she and her sister both had to go potty. Her sister beat her to the potty then told Esmerelda that mommy wouldn't mind if she went in the tub. So she did. And mommy DID mind. But Esmerelda was dumb so she believed her sister.
When Esmerelda was about 12 she was invited to a slumber party. They were playing truth or dare, a staple at 12 year old girl's slumber parties. When she was picked she chose "truth". She was asked if she was a virgin. She said "No". Of course all of the girls eyes got very wide and you could have heard a pin drop. Then Esmerelda said "Doesn't that mean you were born in September?"
Poor Esmerelda continued to do stupid things all her life. At flashing red lights she thought you were supposed to go only when it showed red. It took 10 minutes to get through an intersection with all of that stopping and starting. She never knew why people were honking at her. She thought Cheerios were Alphabits that someone had taken all the "good" letters out of. She thought "peep show" meant a play starring the Easter candy, and the word "oxymoron" meant someone with below average intelligence who had to live in a bubble.
When Esmerelda graduated from college she had to find a job. She put in resume after resume and had interview after interview. No one would hire her. Finally, she applied to be a cashier at a discount store. After the interview the interviewing supervisor was thrilled. After all, they aspire to hire people who look good on paper but are really as dumb as a brick. "We might even put her in one of our commercials" they said.
So Esmerelda took that job. And she made stupid comments to the customers, and made them mad. But the customers knew that was a part of shopping at the discount store, so they didn't mind. And Esmerelda was happy. And the supervisors were happy. And everyone lived happily ever after.
Question (this is as two parter): Are there days when you feel like Esmerelda? Have you run into any "Esmereldas" lately?