Sunday, February 19, 2006

This is the Most Public of my Many Humiliations.

That quote, from Jackie Chiles, the Lawyer on Seinfeld, seems appropriate. Although I suppose it's probably not the most public. I've had far worse humiliations. But I also suppose it isn't the first time I will feel like an idiot when it comes to my kid.

We tried the sleep thing I mentioned below. It worked. In fact, it worked SO well, that the first night it took her 45 minutes to get to sleep, she woke up twice in the night and it took 45 minutes each time to get her to go back to sleep. That alone is a HUGE breakthrough. By the second night it took her 10 minutes to fall asleep and she woke up and fussed for 10 minutes once, but never cried so we didn't even have to go in there. Last night she fell asleep within 30 seconds and woke up in the night but never even fussed and fell back to sleep. Naps are great, too. She still wakes up at the 30 minute mark, as usual. But now she'll cry for maybe a minute then fall back to sleep. I feel like an idiot for fretting so much about this.

Now, in my defense, we DID try something very close to this method when she was about 4 months old, and it DID NOT work. My thinking is she just wasn't ready for it yet then. My assumption was if it didn't work then, it won't work now, and it will just traumatize the kid. Boy, was I wrong.

I think Weary Hag and my husband are right, I need to quit reading the books and do what I think is right. I fret to much.

Question: What is something you worried about, and it turned out to be nothing?


PBS said...

Just about everything, when my son was little! One of the more tricky things about parenting is, you just get one coping mechanism down and suddenly different ones are called for! In other words, different things work at different times.

gina said...

I worry way to much about people- what they are going to do, how they will react, who will get their feelings hurt. i am a horrible people pleaser. i annoy myself often. lol

i am so happy about the sleep thing- you are about to enter a whole new world, mama. you will be rested and refreshed, and then maybe you can start to get out more, enjoy yourself with friends, etc... . what an answer to prayer.

Moo Moo said...

Glad to hear it's working! It's so nice when it works! Naps are hard over here, but we are working on it.. and she really loves that CD of nursery rhymes to nod off too.. so like I always say, don't fix it if it ain't broken! Lol

Happy sleeping!

Chickity China said...

So glad it's working, Carol! You must be pleased. And don't "feel like an idiot for fretting so much about this." Being a parent is the hardest thing in the world...especially the first time. It's all new. But, I do believe the books aren't all they're cracked up to be. You know your baby best...and what's best for her. Plus, usually books contradict each other and you get different advice from every book. It's the same with any subject...everything you read sounds good, but it doesn't always work.

Our generation is very different than our parents' generation. They just did what came naturally (with no books) and people our age seem to think we should read and read and read so we know everything we need to know even if it's too much information. I say just do what YOU think is right...not what an author tells you to do.

I think you're doing great and you've got SUCH a sweet little girl! Some day all of this sleep stuff will be a memory.

Jim said...

Well, Carol, I'm glad. Now everyone can sleep better at your house.
I agree with Chickity about the books. There just aren't any books on how to do kid raising exactly right. You write your own book, then use it in raising the next kid. I.e. the school of hard knocks.
I don't worry much. I do develop a lot of Plan 'B's though. Some I don't need to use.

angela marie said...

I think that having a balance between being well-informed and THEN listening to your own heart and mind is perfect.

This is JUST THE BEGINNING of the 'manipulation of mom and dad'...and she's not even doing it on purpose yet.

Keep on swimming, Nemo! ;)

L said...

it's good that you're making progress :)

MilkMaid said...

Yes, this is just the beginning as Angie has said.

And I'm your sister in fretting. I bet I can out fret you over any little tiny minute thing. It drives me NUTS!

Glad this was easier than you expected...I was a little worried about ya.

Rainypete said...

I'm just glad the sleeping thing is starting to iron itself out. Don't get too worked up about worrying too much. You'll eventually learn to find a balance that works for you. It would be far worse to be a parent that doesn't care at all, in my opinion.

Moo Moo said...

Something I always worry about before I do, is flying.. I hate it.. it just worries me needlessly.. and now flying with baby makes me more nervous... and it's never a big deal.. just beforehand... I worry about it..